So let me get this straight, the unending, all-powerful force of creation that hand-made the universe funneled himself into the body of a human fetus and then teleported the fetus into the uterus of a married virgin. He then spent 30 years on earth walking around doing basically nothing and then one day rearranged reality to set in motion events that would lead to his own death...effectively committing suicide. He does this because his death will, for some or other reason, clear humanity's sin tally (which he, himself is keeping up in heaven). And then after his plans to get himself killed fall into place, he looks around and asks himself why he has abandoned himself? Is that the basic gist of it?